54 Relatable Chandler Bing Quotes to Make You Feel Alright

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It takes tons of movies, series, novels, comics, animes and TV shows for the world to get that one character that lives on for ages. To name a few we have Hannibal Lecter, Naruto, Spider man, Joker and our very own chan chan man- Chandler Bing. The one common thing in all these characters are that they are practically immortal, some through the authors who wrote them and others through the actors who played them. Today we have brought the quirkiest and funniest and sarcastic Chandler Bing Quotes and Sayings that will feel like they fit in your life perfectly too.

Chandler Bing is a character played by Matthew Perry in the TV show F.R.I.E.N.D.S. The show aired from 1994 to 2004 and is still loved by majority of the earth’s population even after decades of it ending. The show is legendary and so is Chandler bing. People look upto him for sarcasm, for jokes and sometimes for love lessons because-“Mondler”.

So let us take out some time to look at some of the best Chandler Bing Quotes and Sayings from the 10 seasons of Friends, that is one of the best and immensely loved TV series of our world. So here we go:

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Chandler Bing Quotes and One liners

1) “I’m hopeless and awkward and desperate for love!”

Chandler Bing Quotes

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2) “I’m not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?”

3) “Hi, I’m Chandler, I make jokes when I’m uncomfortable.”

4) “I’m funny, right? What do you know, you’re a door. You just like knock-knock jokes.”

5) “I’m full, and yet I know if I stop eating this, I’ll regret it.”

Chandler Bing Quotes

6) “Because, Phoebe, sometimes after you sleep with someone you have to kill a fish.”

7) “I think I can safely say that we all have family issues, work, and/or are sick.”

8) “If I were a guy and … did I just say ‘if I were a guy’?”

9) “I’m glad we’re having a rehearsal dinner. I rarely practice my meals before I eat.”

10) “I say more dumb things before 9 a.m. than most people say all day.”

Chandler Bing Quotes

11) “Oh, that makes me feel so warm in my hollow, tin chest.”

12) “I am not “blah”! I’m a hoot.”

13) “Oh, man. In my next life, I’m coming back as a toilet brush!”

14) “I tend to keep talking until somebody stops me.”

Chandler Bing Quotes

15) “Cheese. It’s milk that you chew.”

16) “You have to stop the q-tip when there’s resistance!”

17) “What must it be like not to be crippled by fear and self-loathing?”

18) “When I first meet somebody it’s usually panic, anxiety, and a great deal of sweating.”

19) “So it seems like this internet thing is here to stay.”

Chandler Bing Quotes

20) “It’s always better to lie than to have the complicated discussion.”

21) “We swallow our feelings, even if it means we’re unhappy forever. Sound good?”

22) “Like what she saw, huh? Dug my action, did she? Checking out the Chan Chan Man!”

23) “Should I use my invisibility to fight crime, or for evil?”

24) “I’m a gym member. I try to go four times a week, but I’ve missed the last twelve hundred times.”

Chandler Bing Quotes

25) “Could we be more white trash?”

26) “I can handle this. “Handle” is my middle name. Actually, “handle” is the middle of my first name.”

27) “When I was younger, I started using humour as a defense mechanism.”

28) “Until I was 25, I thought that the only response to ‘I love you’ Was ‘Oh, crap!”

Chandler Bing Quotes

29) “Nice camouflage. For a minute, I almost didn’t see you there.”

30) “I am sorry. We don’t have your sheep.”

31) “I just realized I can sleep with my eyes open.”

Chandler Bing Quotes

32) “Seriously, good luck marrying me.”

33) “Couldn’t we loose our virginities again? Because I think mine’s growing back.”

34) “You know, I think I don’t care.”

35) “It’s a Sunday. I don’t move on Sundays.”

Chandler Bing Quotes

36) “Someone on the subway licked my neck. LICKED MY NECK!”

37) “Dear God, this parachute is a knapsack!”

38) “All right. Rock, paper, scissors for who has to tell the whore to leave.”

39) “I’ve had a very long, hard day.”

Chandler Bing Quotes

Chandler Bing Sayings and Dialogues

40) “If I’m gonna be an old, lonely man, I’m gonna need a thing. You know, a hook, like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. So, I figure I’ll be Crazy Man with a Snake, y’know? Crazy Snake Man. And I’ll get more snakes, call them my babies, kids will walk past my place, they will run. ‘Run away from Crazy Snake Man,’ they’ll shout.”

41) Rachel: “Guys! Guess what, guess what, guess what?!”
Chandler: “The fifth dentist caved and now they’re ALL recommending Trident?”

42) “Why yes Ross, pressing my third nipple. It opens the delivery entrance to the magical land of Narnia.”

43) Joey: “I need to organize my thoughts.”
Chandler: “Your thoughts? Plural?”

44) Ross: “No, homo habilis was erect. Australopithecus was never fully erect.”
Chandler: “Well, maybe he was nervous.”

46) Ross: “I went to that tanning place your wife suggested.”
Chandler: “Was that place the sun?”

47) “Oh, I know. This must be so hard. ‘Oh, no! Two women love me. They’re both gorgeous and sexy. My wallet’s too small for my fifties and my diamond shoes are too tight!”

48) Phoebe: “Oh! Bing! What an unusual name.”
Chandler: “Well you should meet my uncle, Bada.”

49) Chandler: “I got her machine.”
Joey: “Her answering machine?”
Chandler: “No. Interestingly enough her leaf blower picked up.”

50) Janice: “What a small world.”
Chandler: “And yet I never run into Beyonce.”

51) Joey: “Oh, sorry, did I get ya?”
Chandler: “No, you didn’t get me. It’s an electric drill, if you get me, you kill me!”

52) Monica: “Okay, I’ve got a leg, three breasts, and a wing.”
Chandler: “How do you find clothes that fit?”

Chandler: “SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP.”

54) Joey: “Hey, shaving?”
Chandler:”No, rabies.”

Even the people who think that the series is overrated cannot help but still talk about it after so many years. You can love it, you can hate it but you cannot ignore it. Chandler Bing is one of the most iconic character majorly because it is so relatable to the majority- awkward, needy and desperate for love. That is literally all of us. So enjoy these Chandler Bing Quotes and Sayings and Dialogues and One liners and share with all your fellow Friends lovers.

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